International ministry has chapter in Belleville; retreat to be offered in November
When Sarah Surrey’s marriage ended, she found support from the Church in more than one way.
Surrey was attending Christian initiation classes at St. Nicholas Parish in O’Fallon, Illinois, several years ago when her marriage began falling apart. Parishioners rallied around her and her two children, offering help as she moved out of her marital home just two months after she was confirmed in the Church.
“When I needed to move out, my Catholic community came around me and helped me physically move my stuff and replace a lot of the stuff that I had left behind, like dishes — things I wanted to leave at the house,” she said. “I just started over, and my Catholic community came around me for all of that and walked with me through this whole process of starting over.”
Among those offering support was Molly King, director of the Respect Life Office with the Diocese of Belleville. About a year after the move, King reached out to Surrey again, this time to tell her about a ministry she discovered called Momentum, which offers spiritual and emotional support for Catholic single mothers.
Talitha Cere started the ministry in Montreal, Canada, in 2016 with an annual retreat for Catholic single mothers. Two years later, co-founder Claire Brown, who had attended the yearly retreats, suggested offering monthly gatherings throughout the year. The ministry became formally incorporated as a Canadian charity known as Momentum. During the pandemic, the group transitioned to online Zoom meetings and retreats, attracting women from Canada and the United States.
Momentum now has several chapters in Canada that offer in-person meetings, including Ottawa, Halifax and Montreal. Several chapters have been formed in the United States, including in Texas, New York, Massachusetts, and Minnesota. The Belleville chapter launched in August 2024.
Women come from a variety of circumstances. Some may never have married. Other women are separated, divorced, annulled or widowed, while others have adopted children as a single person. Chapters are led by single mothers, and programming is provided through the international ministry, which Surrey said makes the effort of planning meetings easy.
Seeking holiness
As Surrey went through her divorce, she connected with other women in her parish who were in similar situations and invited them to participate in Momentum meetings. About a dozen women are regular attendees at meetings held on Sunday afternoons every other month at St. Clare of Assisi Church in O’Fallon, Illinois.
At a gathering in late September, Surrey and two other women watched a video of a testimonial from another single mom, followed by some reflection questions. The three shared personal stories as they talked about the importance of humility and trust in God as they find support in their faith community.
Erin became a mother 10 years ago, but did not continue a relationship with her child’s father. In choosing life for her child, she discovered that her son was a “godsend. I used to be a workaholic in my career and in my studies, and he’s brought tremendous balance to my life,” she said.
Erin, who declined to give her last name for privacy reasons, said that Momentum is an acknowledgement of the existence of single moms within the Church.
“People sometimes try to achieve some human definition of ‘perfection’ in their congregation and social groups,” she said. “Having never been married and having a child sometimes feels like a scarlet letter, but I know I’m not alone. It’s an acknowledgement that we’re imperfect humans and we can still love God, and we can still pursue holiness and we can help each other out.”
Rachel Layfield met Surrey through a running group and discovered that the two of them had much in common as divorced moms. She also began attending Momentum meetings and found several levels of support from fellow single moms.
“Sometimes it’s, ‘Hey, I’m going to this thing with my kids. Do you want to meet up and bring your kid and we’ll just go together?’ I often think when I’m having a difficult time getting my daughter to bed in the evenings, across town there’s someone else that also is struggling to get their 10 year old to take a shower or struggling to make their kid eat their vegetables,” she said. “And I take a lot of comfort from that, because sometimes as a single mom you feel very alone.”
The Belleville chapter will host a daylong retreat in November in collaboration with the Respect Life offices of Belleville and St. Louis. The retreat is open to all single mothers, and child care will be provided on site. Surrey said she hopes that the retreat will be an invitation to mothers in the St. Louis area to either join the Belleville chapter or form one in the Archdiocese of St. Louis.
Momentum is a recognition of the Church’s pro-life work in walking with moms beyond pregnancy, Surrey said.
The Church “is doing all this pro-life stuff and suggesting in a lot of ways that people keep their kids if they’ve had an unplanned pregnancy,” she said. “Supporting families is bigger than supporting whole families or just supporting women through pregnancy. It’s a whole journey, and I think the Momentum community supports the longevity of that journey.”
Retreat for single mothers
Momentum, a faith community for Catholic single mothers, will offer a day retreat for single mothers and their children from noon-4:30 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 1, at St. Nicholas Parish in O’Fallon, Illinois. The retreat is a time to pause, experience God’s peace and be renewed in faith while connecting with other women who understand the journey of single motherhood. Moms are welcome to attend with or without their children. The retreat is free and includes lunch, snacks and child care. At the conclusion of the retreat, attendees are invited to Mass at 4:30 p.m. To register, visit stlreview.com/46elHUk.
Momentum
To learn more about Momentum or the Belleville chapter, email momentumcatholicsinglemothers@gmail.com or visit www.momentummothers.org.
