Communication and validation of feelings are important for parents in talking to children after shooting

Submitted on September 4, 2025

In the aftermath of the shooting at Annunciation Catholic Church in Minneapolis, parents should acknowledge their children’s feelings through age-appropriate discussions, a St. Louis-based Catholic therapist said.

Two children were killed, and 18 children and three adults were injured on Aug. 27 at Annunciation Church during a Mass celebrated for the adjoining school. The suspect in the shooting also died.

“The most important thing to do is have those conversations in an age-appropriate way, but also to validate their feelings and, as they express themselves, to normalize those feelings,” said Elena Switzer, a licensed clinical social worker and therapist who works with children, teens and families.

Switzer said she talked with her 9-year-old about what happened, but did not get hung up on the details of the shooting. Instead, they focused their conversation on safety and security precautions their school takes to keep students safe.

“It’s important to remind kids they are in a place that is taking all the measures to keep them safe,” Switzer said. “We should remind them that your school has safety precautions in place,” such as security measures for visitors and intruder drills.

Switzer pointed to resources for parents including Sandy Hook Promise, which has tips including potential warning signs that can signal a person may be in crisis, help for survivors of gun violence and guidance for parents on talking to their children about gun violence.

Prayer is another important aspect, especially for those who were killed or injured in the shooting and for the person who was responsible for the shooting, Switzer said. “Hopefully those souls are with the Lord,” she said. “We are called to pray and to be more aware of the people around us,” including looking for signs that a person is in crisis or needs help, she said.

While school shootings happen across the country, there can be a ripple effect when something traumatic happens in a community. Even those who weren’t directly connected can still be impacted by what happened.

Another constructive way of giving children a voice is to proactively do something for those directly impacted by what happened, Switzer said. Young children can make cards or draw pictures for students and staff. Teens might volunteer in their community, and families can make a plan to contact elected officials and public policymakers to find systemic ways to prevent gun violence.

Giving children a voice can be empowering for them, Switzer said. She pointed to the flooding at Camp Mystic in Texas, in which more than two dozen campers and counselors died. Several children organized lemonade stands and raised thousands of dollars to help families impacted by the flooding.

“It was important that they could have a voice in their communities,” she said.