I love bringing my young children to Sunday Mass, but they are often distracted and hard to manage. How can I make Mass a better experience for them?
That is wonderful that you are bringing your children to Mass! It can be quite a challenge to bring little ones in the hope or the expectation that they will sit perfectly still and quiet for a whole hour. However, with perseverance, children can learn the expectations and begin to really and truly engage in the mystery of the Mass. I have three thoughts for you on tips that I’ve heard from families who seem to live the Mass very well with young children.
The first tip is to prepare your children ahead of time. Before Mass, speak to your children about the readings and the Gospel that they will hear. Tell them about the things that they will see — the candles, the crucifix, the tabernacle, perhaps the incense — and what each one of these things mean. The candles mean that we must become the light of Christ. The incense represents our prayers ascending to God. The altar is like Calvary, the mountain where Jesus was crucified. The bread and the wine becoming the Body and Blood means that God will always be there for us. When you speak to your children ahead of time with a tone of excitement and wonder at the mystery of the Mass, this energy will naturally be transmitted to your child.
Secondly, prepare yourself ahead of time, knowing your children may need your attention during Mass. Your vocation as a parent is to foster the life of grace and faith within your child, and sometimes your vocation will require you to give more attention to your child. This does not mean you are lacking in holiness because you cannot pray with recollection. It simply means God is calling you in a different way in that moment to live in charity. Before Mass, consider listening to a podcast on the Sunday readings or taking time to pray with them in your personal prayer time. Then, during Mass, if your attention is required for your child, you will be able to enter back into quiet prayer more readily, since you have already prepared your own heart to engage with the Word of God.
The third thing is to foster a sense of prayer within the home throughout the week. Some families before or after dinner will go around and each person will name something that they are grateful for that day and conclude with a little prayer, “Thank you, Jesus for this gift.”
I know that it is hard! As a priest, I am always so happy to see many young families coming to Mass, despite the challenge, because this is the best gift you can give to your children.
Father Charlie Archer is associate pastor of St. Peter Parish in Kirkwood.
